This Job is Very Humbling

"This job is very humbling" is the first quote I thought of when we received a call from Dr. Kim last week.  Those were Dr. Brown's first words to us following my second fetal echo at Children's Hospital. 

At my first fetal echo,  Dr. Brown told us he thought our baby had Tetralogy of Fallot (TOF).  The doctors drew diagrams and explained the defects to us.  We went home and set out to learn all we could about TOF.
 

A month later, at my second fetal echo, Dr. Brown started the conversation by stating, "This job is very humbling..." and then began telling us that the second echo revealed that our baby's defect was actually not what they originally thought.  It was not TOF.  It was called Transposition of the Great Arteries (TOG) and Pulmonary Stenosis (PS).  He went to explain to us that this new diagnosis,  in his opinion,  was actually better than TOF for a few reasons.  He went on to explain the reasons.

At that point in time, the advantages really didn't seem all that much better to me.  My baby still had a congenital heart defect.  My baby still needed open heart surgery.  And,  now my baby needed open heart surgery at three days old instead of being able to wait until three months old.  How was that better?  But I just believed in what Dr. Brown told us.  I had to.  I had to convince friends and family of the same thing.  No one really understood how a baby needing open heart surgery right away was better off than a baby needing open heart surgery at three months old.

 

  I can still see the look on Dr. Brown's face.  Numb.  Apologetic.  You could see that he was genuinely upset for giving us the incorrect diagnosis a month ago.  But to us that wasn't really a big deal, our baby still had a heart defect.  TOF or TGA.  It was all Greek to us.  Then.

We had learned a lot in that month, but we hadn't lived it yet.  We didn't really understand.   It is amazing what you can learn in eight years.  They say if you want to really learn a foreign language you should spend some time in the native country.  Living with CHD,  you become a heart specialist.  Fluent in all sorts of medical jargon that you couldn't even pronounce a year earlier.

 

Dr. Kim called last week with the same type of news.  After reading the CAT scan results, the Interventional Radiologists feel they may be able to get a wire through the femoral artery and widen it.  A team of doctors have met several times to review the CAT scan results and come up with a new plan.  Wow.  One procedure versus two major surgeries.  This is fabulous news.  A miracle of sorts.  If it works.  Angels are surely watching over us.  Prayers and positive thoughts.  Prayers and positive thoughts.  That is what we need now.  Read  here  about the artery stretching surgeries Kalvin was facing.

 

I know I should be elated.  Singing from the roof tops.  Maybe it just hasn't fully sunken in yet.  But I find myself feeling a little hesitant.  Maybe I don't want to get too excited,  only to be let down if this doesn't work.  I am nervous.  Nervous we may find ourselves back at square one in August. 

I know that kind of thinking isn't helping anyone.  I will block out the possible negative outcomes.   I will think positively.  After all,  the Angels appear to be watching over for us.  This is going to work.  This is such a blessing.  The angioplasty procedure is set for July 29th!  Wooohooo!! We have our summer back.

Kalvin summer 2007

This boy has always loved the water.

No fear.  No anxiety.  Just pure fun.

Seaweed and summer.  Oh boy.  Bring it on.